Quotes of Jarod Kintz - somelinesforyou

“ Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lovers. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ I don’t like to celebrate my birthday, because I don’t like taking credit for others’ work—in this case, my mom and dad. Or possibly my mom and the mailman. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ The event happened on my birthday. I don’t remember the date, I only know it was my birthday because there was no cake or presents.
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- Jarod Kintz

“ On your birthday you should throw me a party. This is my advice for everybody, especially my clones. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ I’d love to create a personal profile on a dating site with a headline that reads, “Great Listener Seeks Mute Woman. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ The difference between you and him and him and me isn’t different at all: we’re all different. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ From the ages of 8. 18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we would just stretch, but occasionally one of us would actually get up to go to the fridge. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ If I could lick the sunset, I’ll bet it would taste like Neapolitan ice cream. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ The mouth is made for communication, and nothing is more articulate than a kiss. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ Leadership is being the first egg in the omelet. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ If loving someone is putting them in a straitjacket and kicking them down a flight of stairs, then yes, I have loved a few people ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ You could empty the trash and my love for you still wouldn’t fit inside. But just because it won’t fit, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t empty the trash. 
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- Jarod Kintz

“ To love someone as much as you love yourself, that is the ideal. Especially if that someone is your clone.
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- Jarod Kintz

“ Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.
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- Jarod Kintz

“ Make pizza, not war. No matter how you slice it, that’s wise. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ God ordered the world and all things in it, and I ordered a pizza and all things on it. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ I talked to a calzone for fifteen minutes last night before I realized it was just an introverted pizza. I wish all my acquaintances were so tasty. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ It’s absolutely unfair for women to say that guys only want one thing: sex. We also want food. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ I once met Michael Phelps. Our encounter went swimmingly. ”

- Jarod Kintz

“ Vacation, I go there in my mind. Especially when I’m at work, getting paid for it. ”

- Jarod Kintz
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