“ Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking. ”
- Dave Barry- Copy
- 1.4K
“ Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. ”
- Ernest Hemingway- Copy
- 2.6K
“ Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. ”
- Fran Lebowitz- Copy
- 2.2K
“ My Grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle. ”
- Henny Youngman- Copy
- 331
“ It is better to hide ignorance, but it is hard to do this when we relax over wine. ”
- Heraclitus- Copy
- 392
“ The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. ”
- Martin Mull- Copy
- 2K
“ One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time. ”
- Nancy Astor- Copy
- 290
“ I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on. ”
- Oscar Levant- Copy
- 2.8K
“ Slap a mask on a drunk and you're going to have trouble. It's like having a live reenactment of anonymous forum comments. ”
- Randy K. Milholland- Copy
- 3.7K
“ Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony. ”
- Robert Benchley- Copy
- 2K
“ I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake--which I also keep handy. ”
- W. C. Fields- Copy
- 967
“ Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. ”
- W. C. Fields- Copy
- 3.1K
“ It's always difficult to make conversation with a drunk, and there's no denying it, the sober are at a disadvantage with him. ”
- W. Somerset Maugham- Copy
- 90
“ I feel sorry for people who don’t drink. When they wake up in the morning, that’s as good as they’re going to feel all day. ”
- Frank Sinatra- Copy
- 1.8K
“ The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. ”
- Humphrey Bogart- Copy
- 1.6K
“ Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. ”
- Dave Barry- Copy
- 3.7K
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