“ I think if Kerry were to win this in a tight race, I think there would be an effort to mount a coup, quite frankly. ”
- Bill Moyers- Copy
- 2.2K
“ There's a reason that they're saying Kerry is the No. 1 liberal in the Senate, it's because he is the No. 1 liberal in the Senate. ”
- Michael Moore- Copy
- 1.6K
“ A new poll shows that Senator Kerry's support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry's appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a white man who lives far, far away. ”
- Dennis Miller- Copy
- 3.8K
“ Ted Kennedy is endorsing John Kerry and I'm wondering, do you really want the endorsement of a guy with a Bloody Mary mustache? ”
- David Letterman- Copy
- 3.7K
“ Senator John Kerry released his plan today to eliminate the deficit. He said all we have to do is find a really rich country like Switzerland and marry it. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 1.4K
“ Your security does not lie in the hands of Kerry, Bush or al-Qaeda. Your security is in your own hands. ”
- Osama Bin Laden- Copy
- 3K
“ According to a new study, Botox injections can help back pain. So you see, that's why John Kerry had all that Botox - his back was killing him from all that flip-flopping on issues. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 3.4K
“ Increasing minimum wages, as Kerry wants to do, makes it more difficult for an unskilled, uneducated worker to find a job. ”
- Larry Elder- Copy
- 471
“ If John Kerry had a dollar for every time he bragged about serving in Vietnam - oh wait, he does. ”
- Ann Coulter- Copy
- 3.4K
“ In his years in Washington, Senator Kerry has been one vote of a hundred in the United States Senate - and fortunately on matters of national security he was very often in the minority. ”
- Dick Cheney- Copy
- 2.8K
“ I can think of a lot of words to describe Senator Kerry's position on Iraq; consistent is not one of them. ”
- Dick Cheney- Copy
- 3.9K
“ Senator Kerry assures us that he's the one to win a war he calls a mistake, an error, and a diversion. But you can't win a war if you don't believe in fighting. ”
- George W. Bush- Copy
- 1K
“ In a new issue of Esquire magazine, they revealed that before he was married to Teresa Heinz, Senator John Kerry dated Morgan Fairchild, Michelle Phillips, Catherine Oxenberg and Dana Delany. Finally a Democratic presidential candidate with good taste in women. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 2.5K
“ I cannot tell you how many times a person assumed I voted for John Kerry in 2004. Most of the time, I don't have the heart to tell them, or the energy to discuss my reasons for going red this election year. ”
- Michele Zipp- Copy
- 418
“ If John Kerry thinks this war is a mistake and if the United States of America elects him president, the troops are going to have to live with that. And they know better than anyone else whether it was a mistake or not. I don't care if they're demoralized… ”
- Lawrence O’Donnell- Copy
- 2.6K
“ They had a profile of John Kerry on the news and they said his first wife was worth around $300 million and his second wife, his current wife, is worth around $700 million. So when John Kerry says he's going after the wealthy in this country, he's not just talking… ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 1K
“ The Democrats are all over this. Democratic strategists feel John Kerry's war record means he can beat Bush. They say when it comes down to it voters will always vote for a war hero over someone who tried to get out of the war. I'll be sure to mention that to Bob Dole when I see him. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 81
“ Kerry has already begun his search for a running mate. They say that because John Edwards still has $50 million in campaign money, Kerry might pick him. Pick him? Hey, for $50 million, Kerry will marry him. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 2.4K
“ John Kerry was the big winner in Iowa. Ted Kennedy introduced Kerry as the 'comeback kid.' That used to be Bill Clinton's name - because every time he would come back to a city, he would find out if he had a kid or not. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 1K
“ A number of plastic surgeons are claiming that looking at John Kerry now, as opposed to a few months ago, they believe he's had Botox shots. They claim a number of his worry lines have vanished. They haven't vanished, just Howard Dean is wearing them now. ”
- Jay Leno- Copy
- 1.4K
“ George Bush, Dick Cheney, every one of the speakers praised John Kerry's war record. No one said he was unfit. They said he has terrible judgment, and that's his record as a senator. Nobody questioned his military record. ”
- Peter King- Copy
- 3.4K
“ Remember the claims by John Kerry and others of one million black voters disenfranchised in Florida during the 2000 presidential election? Peter Kirsanow, a black attorney and member of the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights, says the commission's six-month investigation failed to find any evidence of black voter intimidation. ”
- Larry Elder- Copy
- 1.9K
“ You know, to listen to Senator Lieberman, Senator Kerry, Representative Gephardt, I'm anti-Israel, I'm anti-trade, I'm anti-Medicare and I'm anti-Social Security. I wonder how I ended up in the Democratic Party. I'm not a new entrant to the Democratic Party… ”
- Howard Dean- Copy
- 662
“ Someone earlier made a remark about losing 500 soldiers and 2,200 wounded in Iraq. Those soldiers were sent there by the vote of Sen. Lieberman, Sen. Edwards and Sen. Kerry. I think that is a serious matter. ”
- Howard Dean- Copy
- 300
- 1